Fibromyalgia is more than just pain.
It’s feeling like everything is slowly slipping away from you because you’re not fast enough. It’s the panic that creeps up on you, bit by bit until it stifles you completely. It’s making decisions that feel like you’re quitting even though you’re doing it for your health. Then doubting yourself, unsure if you’re just afraid to fail. It’s disappointing everyone you love in some way, and then disappointing yourself. It’s making sacrifices that hurt your pride and leave a bitter taste in your mouth. It’s giving up things you love because you just don’t think you can do it anymore. It’s having to act like you’re 60 when you’re 19 to make sure you don’t overtire yourself. It’s having to realize that at 19 you can overtire yourself. It’s the fear of having to explain why you can’t do something anymore because you don’t know how people will understand that even stress alone terrifies you because of the pain that it entails.
Having fibromyalgia is like being smothered by a silk pillow.
Gentle, slow, but no less suffocating.